Dear Matt Harvey, your stuff won’t translate in Fake New Yankee Stadium

Dear Matt Harvey,

I was thinking about you at three in the morning.  I do that sometimes.

Look bro, I know you realllllly want to be a Yankee.  Don’t do it.

I watched all but one of your Reds starts…and you know those 379 foot outs you often threw….those will not translate in Fake New Yankee Stadium.

You will be MISERABLE in the Bronx.  It will not go the way you think

So trust me Matt.  Go find a nice big park somewhere and go 15-10 and let some speedy youngster catch those fly balls for you.  Otherwise…

You don’t want to feel that way.  You want to feel like this…

Remember that guy?  That guy won’t exist in Fake New Yankee Stadium.  Don’t do it.  Honestly, you had a good thing going in Cincy.  You should probably just stay.

Now hold on, I am getting some tweets about this post.  Basically they say “who cares, talk about the Mets”

Are you kidding me?  Talk about what?  That Jeff McNeil could be the 2B?  That Scott Boras thinks the Wilpons are cheap?  Matt Harvey moves the numbers peeps.   You’re still here, right?

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