K-Rod Off To Dopey Start By Choosing #75

Dear K-Rod,

Please reconsider your poor choice of uniform number, 75.  That’s not a baseball number.   Yes you wanted 57 but you can’t have it.  Ever.   Yes you’d like 37 but that’s gone too.   You might consider 17 and if they made Franco change numbers after 10 years I’m sure they can make Tatis change numbers.   Of course it boggles the mind that 17 isn’t retired. (link).

Anyway, 75 is a horrible number.  It makes me hostile to you before you throw a pitch.   I’ll be in my expensive last row seats and I’ll see a 75 come out of the bullpen (wherever those are at Taxpayer Bailout Corporate New Shea Field – reminder to everyone to avoid using the corporate name until the Mets refuse to take taxpayer money.) and I will get angry.   It better not be a black 75 or I will get very angry.

Also, while you are appeasing me, please drop the nickname.  (see here: 7 Things K-Rod & Mets Fans Need To Know ).

Sincerely,

Your pals at www.metspolice.com

Advertisements

Yanks offer AJ; Does Omar Hate Starters

Espn is reporting the Yankees offered AJ Burnett a five year deal.

I was planning on writing tonight about how Omar seems to think the Mets have pitching. Every free agent whether Burnett or CC or Lowe has been attached to the Yankees. I haven't heard a single Mets rumor.

I'm president of the Niese fanclub but he's kinda untried don't you think? I love Maine but he's coming off an injury and wasn't really that good last year. Do you really believe in Pelfrey yet?

I haven't analyzed the Burnett deal. Maybe it's awful. Maybe he breaks down in two years. The Mets have money, don't act like they don't have every advantage the Yankees have – they do (network and new stadium).

Omar you need three starters. Pick up the phone.

As far as I'm concerned there's only one acceptable option for 2009: win the world series. After these last three seasons a pennant, division or dopey wild card isn't enough. 23 years and counting – time to raise a flag!

Sent via BlackBerry from T-Mobile

Yankees Steal The Back Page

I hope K-Rod has learned to read www.metspolice.com and read 7 Things K-Rod & Mets Fans Need To Know About Each Other yesterday because one of the predictions has already came true.

I spent yesterday telling Yankee fans that the NYYs would sign Sabathia “three hours” after the Mets got K-Rod.   Sure enough you woke up this morning expecting to read about the Mets, and Sabathia will be the topic of the day.

The Yankees do not like it when the Mets get the spotlight.   The Mets announce a stadium, the Yankees announce a stadium.  The Mets pick a year to open a new one, the Yankees pick a new one.  Spotlight your new park with an exhibiion on April 3rd – we can do that too!   The Mets would have had today to themselves – nope, now it’s C.C.’s day.

The Yankees will be stuck with a guy who didn’t want to be here.  He’s Randy Johnson.  He’s A-Rod.   They came for the money but never won.

I’m excited about K-Rod even though deep down I know we’ll wind up hating him when he puts people on and only throws 92 mph.  That’s the scars in my psyche from Vince Coleman, Bobby Bonilla, and Four Inning Pedro.    Free Agents always let the Mets down.    Omar had to do it, and it was the right play.   Now I want Omar to take that Federal Bailoit Money and go get me three starters, two corner outfielders, a catcher, a second baseman and someone to pitch the eight.

www.metspolice.com

Santo Wants HOF Watered Down

OK so he didn’t use those words exactly. Here is what Ron Santo said yesterday after not being selected by the Veterans Committee:

”It’s a travesty,” Santo said, according to the Chicago Sun-Times. ”When I saw nobody got in again, I go, ‘Whoa, this is wrong.’ They can’t keep going the way they’re going. They’ve got to put a [different] committee out there. It’ll be eight years now that they’ve voted and not let anybody in.”

So according to Mr. Santo, the Veterans Committee should always be putting people in. Quantity over quality.

Does Santo realized who makes up the current committee? It’s all the living Hall of Famers! So he just insulted the very group that he wants to belong to!

Hey Ron, nowhere does it say that the Hall of Fame has to put anyone in if they don’t think they were qualified. And clearly the BBWAA and the current Hall of Fame members do not think you are qualified.

www.metspolice.com

Merry Christmas: Nearly Bankrupt NFL Lays Off 10% Of HQ Staff

The NFL in grave danger of going out of business is eliminating 150 jobs in the back offices. 
 
Roger Goodell said, “Properly managed, I am confident the NFL will emerge stronger, more efficient and poised to pursue long-term growth opportunities.”
 
No this is not an Onion-like article.  These are real people losing their jobs because, you know, the NFL isn’t making money.
 
 
Fans of individual teams need not worry.  For example, the New York Giants should be financially sound for years by charging their fans $20,000 for the opportunity to buy tickets.