Media Tips For A-Rod For Spring Training

To:  Alex Rodriguez
Fr:  The Mets Police
Re:  What to do now

Dear Alex,

I’ve pulled together some suggestions for you as the Yankees head to spring training.

1.  Make sure you’re not on steroids.  I know that seems obvious, but heaven forbid you get caught again.

2.  Show up for camp early.   Get on a plane now and show up.   I see Jeter & Posada are already hanging around.   Be seen running laps and taking grounders.  Don’t be seen with Madonna or strippers.

3.  Have a press conference and answer every question you can, short of implicating others.  Nobody likes a snitch.   Stand there for 17 hours if that’s what it takes.

4.  If you have done steroids since 2003 admit it at that press conference.

5.  Ask Joe Girardi to play you as much as he can in the spring.   If he can give you nine innings without it messing up some younger player’s development then play nine.  Take the bus to some road games too and get used to the heckling.

6.  Learn to say “I’m sorry.”  No qualifiers.  Don’t try to halo yourself by using the “everyone else was doing it defense.”  Enough with “naive” and “stupid” and “culture.”   Things like “I was wrong” and “I let everyone down” go a long way.

www.metspolice.com

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Quicky A-Rod thoughts (no Mets in the 103 right?)

The text of A-Rod’s apology reads much better than it sounded. On tv it just seemed like he needed to get in the words naive and stupid as many times as possible.

Does anyone actually use the phrase loosey-goosey when not apologizing to Peter Gammons? Is that a phrase Alex uses when clubbing in Miami.

Question to everyone: what are you mad at? Why do you care anyway? Root for the guy or don’t. Watch the games or don’t. At the end of the day it’s just television programming for the summer.

People were much less interested in steroids before a surly black man put up the biggest numbers.

Jeter’s quote still bothering me. The correct answer would have been “no.” (Read down the blog if you don’t know what I’m talking about.)

I guess Jose Canseco is less of a crazy-talker than people made him out to be.

I really look forward to getting back to Mets talk around these parts but (a) its hard story to ignore and (b) the Mets don’t do anything good or bad and I can only wax poetically about Lee Mazzilli so many times.

Of the 103 players left on the list none were Mets right? I have an idea about one but I’ll get lynched if I voice it.
Sent via BlackBerry from T-Mobile

Jeter’s Quote Has Been Bothering Me All Day

I’m not throwing stones.  I’m not making accusations.   I’m being honest that Derek Jeter’s quote today on the Daily News website is bothering me.

Jeter was asked if he was worried about his name being on the list:

“Why would I worry about me being on the list?”

Why not just say “no.”

Here’s Curt Schilling on his blog:

And before anyone asks, I’ll make it clear: My name will not appear on any lists of positive tests. I’ve never tested positive for steroids or HGH, and I’ve never taken steroids or HGH in my life, ever. You don’t need to call the union, or an agent to verify that.

Those are two very different answers.

If anyone wants to break down the captain’s statistics you can find them here.

www.metspolice.com

For $27 Million You Might Do Steroids Too

You’re good at your job.   What if I could give you some medicine that would make you the best ever?  All you need to do is drink this every day.

You’ll be so good you’ll make more money than you could ever need.  Never mind life-changing money, this is dynasty changing money.  No, not the Yankees, your dynasty.

For over $27 million dollars a year you can drink my magic potion and be the best.  73 grand a day my friend.

Want to buy your old high school buddy a new car?  Done.  Pay cash.  40 grand to spend in cash left over.

You could take care of your parents.  You could buy them a mansion with a week’s worth of money.   Cash.

Your kids and their kids and their kids?  They will never want for a single thing unless they take investing advice from the Wilpons.

You might do it.  You could be the best.  Sure everyone will still like the charismatic guy at the office a little better than you, but you could ditch your wife and bang Madonna!  You could have it all!

I used to get mad at the steroids.  The damage is long since done.  You chose to ignore it when it was two smiling guys in 1998.   You kinda got annoyed that a surly black man decided to become king in 2001 and again in 2007.   You cried hysterically when Rajah returned to the Bronx, as if he weren’t some sort of mercenary Red Sock.   You ignored it all.  Why not ignore this one too?

The damage is done, the records are ruined.  73 is 73 now, and A-Rod is A-Rod.  Let him hit his 800 homers.  You can sit home and watch old Roger Maris highlights while the Yankees draw 4 million every year.

I’m sorry A-Rod doesn’t smile as nice as you’d like or give the right quotes.   He’s one of the best players in the game right now.   A-Fraud?  You’re the one who cheered him when he stepped into the batters box.  Why stop now?   At least he’s admitted he was wrong, how about you?   For 27 million dollars a year you might do steroids too.

www.metspolice.com

A-Rod admitted it to Gammons, let’s move on


Alex Rodriguez spoke to ESPN’s Peter Gammons today and admitted taking steroids:

When I arrived in Texas in 2001, I felt an enormous amount of pressure. I needed to perform, and perform at a high level every day.

Back then, [baseball] was a different culture. It was very loose. I was young, I was stupid, I was naïve. I wanted to prove to everyone I was worth being one of the greatest players of all time. 

I did take a banned substance. For that, I’m very sorry and deeply regretful.

As for the 60 Minutes interview with Katie Couric:

at the time, I wasn’t being truthful with myself. How could I be truthful with Katie Couric or CBS?

Many of the world’s major religions speak about forgiveness.  Perhaps your does too.  Maybe you’re just an American.  We’re a forgiving people.   He admitted it.   He said he’s sorry.   We can beat him up about not being honest with us in the past, now he has.   It’s over.   Time to move on.

www.metspolice.com